i've got no friends.
Monday, February 22, 2010
when i pop by to visit a blog, sometimes i wonder if the posts are dedicated to me.
on a side note, i feel like a baby boy who's lost his favourite blanket.
im not gonna cry. im just gonna wait. wait and wait till someone returns it to me. hopefully.
or maybe i should go and look for it. yeah. but, im afraid of leaving my cot. ):
Thursday, February 11, 2010
tell me why am i so affected?
tell me why, everytime you apologize, i die a little inside?
tell me, do you see me?
tell me, am i just thinking too much?
YES. just shut up already. WAKE UP!
jeanette says ive changed. my self-esteem has dropped by alot. im more emo now.
honestly, i wonder why.
and its as if the harder you try, the harder it gets.
history its repeating itself.
help me.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Dear you.
I have known you for almost 3 years now. And for 2 of them I have been in love with you. I love how you always can make me smile, or cheer me up when I’m sad or down, or how you can make a joke only I will understand. I love how you’ll tell me secrets that no one is supposed to know, or how you can tell a story from your day and somewhat make me feel like I was there.
I wish I could tell you how you make me feel. That every time someone says your name, even if they talk about another person, there is a thump in my stomach. Or that when you call me, or we talk on the phone, and you beg me not to hang up, my heart speeds up and I smile. Or that when you hold my hand in the dark, drunk as you were, I never wanted to let go. Or that when you tell me, drunk again, how happy you are that you have me, and how kind I always am, I want to tell you how I feel. I really wish I could tell you.
I want you to know that I often look for you at school. You might not notice, but sometimes I do. I try to talk to you when I see you, or at least show you that I’m there and want your attention. I really just want to talk to you more, like we used to. A few years ago I think you might have been my best friend. I still want that. I want to be able to watch movies like we did. Scary ones, so I could sit closer to you, or sometimes even hold your hand. And you were holding mine.
I wish I could tell you all this, and that you would feel the same, but I think I’ll never be able to. I’m too scared to loose you, to lose the friendship we have. But maybe some day I’ll be able to risk it. Just to have a chance of being with you. Maybe one day I finally will. Or you will.
I wish I could be only yours,
-M
Friday, January 01, 2010
in a span of just 24 hours, four different people have commented good things about me. i am honestly flattered. but, do i deserve this praise?
Saturday, December 26, 2009
You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work or at school when you've made up your mind that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
Have you ever walked down the street and realised that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.
I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. Try not to type the word "Regards" again in an email.
Do you remember when you were a kid, playing SEGA and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet back then to turn to. Today's kids are weak.
Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realise I had no idea what the fuck was going on when I first saw it.
I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's definitely watching and laughing at the right parts.
I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.
LOL has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say".
How many times is it appropriate to say "Huh?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?
I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a moron from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!
While riding yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it... thanks Mario Kart.
Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
Bad decisions make good stories.
Is it just me or do secondary/jc girls get sluttier and sluttier every year?
Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart or get new players.
As a driver I hate pedestrians and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists. and taxi drivers.
There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page report that I swear I did not make any changes to.
I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Darnit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.
Why is a school zone 40km/h? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for paedophiles...
Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phones etc, but I bet my ass everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time...
I wonder if the traffic police ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.
I think the freezer deserves a light as well.